The Cats of Life

I love animals. When my then-boyfriend (now husband) and I moved to the mountains last year, we were very excited to introduce a dog into our family soon. But I had the bar exam, and then the wedding, so we said we’ll get the dog when things settle down. We’re still dogless, because we have imposed upon ourselves the condition that we must be home for thirty days straight before we can bring in the responsibility of a dog. We haven’t managed that yet. Wish us luck. [UPDATE: I adopted Sparkle about three months after publishing this blog post, because although my husband still wasn’t home for thirty days straight, I was, and I was lonely. I still have the dog. I no longer have the husband.]

But you know who else never had a dog? The Facts girls. But they did briefly have a cat in the two-part final episode of season five. Jo was none too pleased.

That’s Tootie’s cat, Jeffie (a present from her illiterate boyfriend Jeff, natch). Tootie doesn’t think much of Jo’s opinion.

Mrs. Garrett, meanwhile, is deathly allergic to cats (I feel you, sister).

Mrs. G orders the cat out of the house, and we never see Jeffie again. The story I tell myself is that Tootie left the cat in DC with her parents and it got eaten by an eagle.

Eastland had a small farm, though, so, at least in season one before they were put on KP until graduation, the girls interacted with a pig,

And a horse and bunnies.

And then of course there was the squirrel in season four.

In season four episode 19, “Guess Who’s Coming to Dinner,” Mrs. Garrett’s chef mentor from Paris brings his family to visit, and it just so happens that that’s exactly when Blair insists on sleeping with the window open (no screen, apparently), and the squirrel gets in. Tootie advocates for the squirrel, as “one of God’s creatures,” squaring off with Jo, who makes squirrel extermination her raison d’etre. Wacky chaos ensues when the squirrel ends up in a gift box for the chef, sending the stuffy Frenchies right on top of the tables. It’s a forgettable episode, but SQUIRREL!!!!

As far as I can recall, these are the only animals in Facts except for a cat extra in the first episode of season seven…

…and Blair’s friend Mr. Frog, destroyed in the fire that claimed Edna’s Edibles but replaced with love by her BFF Jo.

I’m sure I’ve missed some others. There may be other animal extras that I didn’t happen to find while looking for Mr. Frog. I also seem to recall another Mrs. Garrett allergy scene. And there was also the time in season five, right after Natalie’s father died, when I think Tootie suggested sneaking a cat into their room. And a parrot. Apparently there was a parrot in the episode where Andy has a crush on Tootie.

But nine seasons, and not a single dog? Tragic.